Global Filipino Forum

Sunday, January 14, 2007

The politics of loving

The politics of loving

Danilo AraƱa Arao
Philippine Daily Inquirer (Youngblood), 14 February 1995, p. 9

LOVE cuts across all classes and races, and even activists cannot escape it, no matter how hard they try.

In line with this, I remember a true story written by Quijano de Manila and included in his book "Reportage on Lovers" about two Kabataang Makabayan members falling in love, and fulfilling a vow to watch each other's back as they pursue revolutionary ends. This love affair had a tragic twist for the man, since his beloved turned out to be a military agent who had him arrested. The moral of the story: Activists who fall in love must carefully investigate their partner's class background, which the man in the story surprisingly failed to do.

Indeed, progressives tend to believe that love cannot exist between two people coming from different social classes, for the simple reason that the prevailing class conflict would definitely go against them.

Of course, there is a way out for an impoverished person to end up with a rich loved one: The former should try to convince the latter to give up material wealth in favor of taking the side of the "lower" class. Theoretically, there is not much problem in case the couple comes from the same social class, since they are aware of each other's situation and would most likely be motivated to change society for the better --- if not for themselves, for the sake of their children.

Most progressive groups adhere to this concept of class love, and frown upon the elite's practice of sex love. The latter refers to love in its commercialized form, highlighted by material and sexual rewards. Contrary to popular notion that activists are promiscuous and are likely to be exposed to orgies during educational discussions or late-night meetings, they actually have the strictest policies prohibiting lovers from engaging in sex until after they are married.

Anyway, sex love prevails in our society today, as seen in promises of World Youth Day delegates to stay "clean and pure" until they walk down the aisle. It is also manifested by the Catholic Church's hardline stance against the use of artificial methods of birth control, since these may encourage promiscuity among today's youth.

The traditional celebration of Valentine's Day around the world also has vestiges of sex love, given the de facto obligation between lovers to give each other a valuable gift (the more expensive, the better). As confirmed by most World Youth Day delegates, there is also strong peer pressure to engage in sexual activities without being fully aware of birth control methods or even the grave implications of such acts (e.g., unwanted pregnancies).

Simply put, sex has become a commodity to be consumed mainly for pleasure. In the final analysis, this has also become a major cause of the degradation of women's status in society.

I guess all these are enough reasons to believe class love is better than sex love. After all, we can find relevance through the former and consequently remove the commercialism associated with loving. Suffice it to say that only through class love can we relate the feeling of care and being wanted with the prevailing societal conditions. In the process, we can ensure that our partners will work with us in the struggle for social emancipation.

With the passage of time, the love that exists between two people would be the key toward understanding the imperative for social action, which can go as far as revolution. If and when they reach this level of ideological development, it is likely that their marriage would be officiated by neither a fiscal nor a priest, and that their exchange of vows would take place in an area unknown to the "enemy."

Yes, time will come when misunderstandings will arise from the relationship, which are quite normal for lovers. But those engaged in class love know how to transcend petty squabbles given their deeper understanding of each other.

They possess the kind of love that does not diminish, but actually grows with the passage of time. After all, love for progressives is like the revolution. It is a protracted struggle where lovers fight not only for themselves, but for the nation's future.

At this point, I consider myself lucky, because...

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Danny Arao, 26, teaches Political Science at De La Salle University.

Change It Up

Are you doing the same things you've always done but are somehow hoping for different results? It's been said over and over again that you can't expect different results from doing the same thing. If you're looking for different results, look at some ways to change your activities.

Are you frustrated with your results, but keep doing the same thing, thinking that some day the flood gates will open and success will come rushing your way? It's been said again and again by experts in many fields that you won't get different results by doing the same thing.

Seems like common sense, right? Then why do we continue to do the same things we always do but somehow expect to eventually get different results? Often we think that if we keep plugging along and "paying our dues" that someday all our hard work will pay off and we will be rewarded for our efforts. In some cases, that may be true, but it is certainly the exception rather than the rule. If we want different results, we need to change the way we do things.

Although sometimes it may be necessary to completely revamp your entire approach, in most cases, you probably only need to change a tactic or two to start seeing better results. And if you change something small, and it makes things worse, it's fairly simple to revert back to the method that was at least partially working for you, and you can change something else.

Use common sense. Analyze your approach and have a clear vision of what you want your results to be. Where would changes make sense and not be counter-productive? Do you have an experienced mentor you could consult who may be able to lead you in the right direction? Do you have a client base that you could conduct market research with to determine what would make them want to buy your product? If all else fails, you can always consult trusted friends, associates or even family members to get a fresh viewpoint on the situation.

Often, we are so consumed in our own tasks that it is hard for us to be objective and we often miss obvious answers that lie right before our eyes. Unbiased outsiders, however, are at an advantage, and sometimes those who are completely unexperienced in a given field can provide the most advantageous insights, albeit unwittingly. You may be looking at your situation from such a technical perspective that it never occurred to you that a completely common sense solution is right there.

Don't be afraid to try something new. You may be astounded by your results, and even if you aren't, you'll become more adaptable to change and more prepared to change to meet demands in your marketplace. Your changes don't have to be permanent. You are in charge of your own actions and destiny, so you can continue to change until you achieve the results you desire.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Angela is a Life Coach, and publisher of Life Synergy Solutions - Lessons From a Life Coach, a website dedicated to helping people achieve total success in all areas of their lives. Visit her website for more great articles and info, or to inquire about a free initial coaching session, at http://www.24success.com.